Friday, April 16, 2010

I'd like to thank the little people who made this possible...



Drumroll please......
I have recently been awarded my first Blog award (how cool is that?) from Diane over at Just Humor Me.
According to the rules of the award, if you receive the award you have the choice of doing one of the following:

(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, stream-of-consciousness style.

b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.

(c) Make your next post a "vlog", or video blog
Then when you are done you are supposed to pass the award on to at least three amazing bloggers, like yourself.

So I have been trying to decide which I would do...(decisions, decisions
This was hard because first of all I have no idea how to do a vlog. So that left either blog while drunk or share my most embarrassing moment...which is hard to choose because I have had MANY embarrassing moments in my lifetime. One of which was when I began taking yoga classes 3 years ago at an awesome (and unfortunately now defunct) yoga studio. The first month they were slow getting people to take classes but for me it was really great because the owner/instructor Jason would do class and it would be just me. Since I had never done yoga before  it was like have my own personal yoga instructor. 

So one day about a month into classes we are having class (just me & him) and we are doing this position called happy baby. Now when you are in this position you are lying on your back with the soles of your feet facing the ceiling and your knees bent kinda like a frog... you can hold your ankles and you are trying to "open" up your hips. So anyways.. we are almost through with class and are doing happy baby and Jason notices my form is off and comes over to adjust how I am holding the position. In doing so something within me relaxed and as he turned around to go back to his mat I let loose with a really loud fart... you know one of those ones that creeps up on you and  you simply cannot hold back that sounds like a motorcycle discharging? 

Considering the fact that it was just me & him in the room there was no way to pass it off on someone else...(not that I would EVER do that *cough cough*- I have 2 dogs for a reason!)


So the fart is "hanging there" so to speak (both literally & figuratively) and I am thinking OMFG!!!! and I freeze (I don't know, in hopes that my sphincter muscles would somehow atrophy?) but in doing so somehow I inadvertently triggered something and I then felt the pressure of another building. (I couldn't make this shit up if I tried) So I am lying there legs up in the air, trying to hold the next one in and Jason being the gentleman he was, just continues on with class like nothing ever happened. The pressure of trying to keep myself "composed" begins to wear and I feel like I am beginning to sweat a bit... luckily it was the end of class and Jason put some music on during our final meditation time... he is telling me to try and find my focus, and control my breathing... meanwhile the mantra I am saying in my head is  "you will not fart again, you will not fart again..."

So we are in  the ultimate relaxation pose-dead mans pose- and I am trying to relax, but am afraid to REALLY relax for fear that I will let loose with another fart. The music is now fading... and we are to the part at the end where all we are doing is deep breathing... the room is silent.


Until...
yes...

*sigh*


fart #2 (shoot me now)


I of course was mortified... and I think I said something like "you have got to be kidding me- I'm sorry". Jason, being the cool dude he was told me it was perfectly fine, that it was a natural occurrence during yoga. I think he was just being nice...

That was just one of my most embarrassing moments...

SO.. I hereby bequeath the incredibly prestigious OH MY BLOG award to:
Nicolasa over at Keepin' it in Perspective , Midlife Mama at  Midlife Musings , and Michaela over @ Gimme that tea towel I'll dry

Skippy over at I Make Soap- I know you have not been feeling well, but when you are up to it I nominate you as well! :)

What'll it be ladies??? :)

9 comments:

  1. OMG, farting in yoga! The perfect Most Embarrassing Moment. Farting in yoga is so common, I'm sure the teacher has seen/heard/smelled it many, many times. How could you not laugh?
    SO funny! I loved this story.

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  2. And that is why I don't do yoga. Well that and I expect someone to buy me a very expensive dinner before I show 'em my downward facing dog.

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  3. Awwwwwww thank you so much for the award!! :) You are so awesome. I will post about it right away. :))

    And as far as your embarrassing moment story? ROFLMAO! Holy cow. That made me laugh so hard! What a great way to start a Monday. Oh farts just crack me up. What I hate, is when you're in the grocery store and you feel one of those building up, and you know it's gonna come out, so you move to an aisle with no one in it and you let 'er rip....only to have someone turn the corner and step into your aisle at that very moment, and of course there you are with your face hanging out and there's no one else to blame it on because you're the only one there...*sigh*. Yipes.

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  4. Diane...at the time I was too embarrassed to laugh.. later though I did :)

    Elly Lou- I guess that just makes me easy ;) no dinner for me :)

    Midlife- you're quite welcome... in the grocery store situation if they have not actually heard the fart- I always look at them like they did it ;) then get the hell outta Dodge...

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  5. Congrats! hahah this is hilarious! Embarrassing...YES!

    Thank you so much for passing this my way!

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  6. Oh that is really hilarious! ROFL. Thanks so much for your support and well-wishes during my tough times lately. Ya know, I dont even know your name? I just think of you as "mom lane". (In a way I think our names dont matter. You can go by any name you want on the internet, but your soul is unique and will shine through, no matter what). Thanx for the award!!!! Im excited! (in a low-key depressed kind of way). I will get right on it. Hugs xxxooo

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  7. Very nice post! hilarious!
    also- um, stop by tomorrow (wed) because you, er, won something at my blog....hint: the prize is being announced on Hump Day ;)

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  8. You are very understanding - and now that I am feeling so much better I happily accept your nomination [I am thrilled actually!] but I simply cannot top farting in yoga - I think they left the "You WILL be embarrassed Skippy" gene out of my reportoire when I was born. And I don't drink [damn, should have done a stream of conciousness while on Dialuad in the hospital Pooldad sure did get a kick out me on drugs for a week LOL] Although in my younger days I would've loved this one. So I guess I will have to VBlog - I will get Squirrel to help - now to pick a subject of ridicule, heehee.

    Thanks again - it means a lot. I will let you know when I post [thanks for the extra time too]

    Love you!

    PS word vert is missup - kind of like a miss up in your life is your most embarrassing moment. LOL I love word verts sometimes :D

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